Campus 0013

Why in the world are you living in a nomad tent?

Campus 0012

Girl 1: So, this construction worker hit on me yesterday.
Girl 2: Oh, so was he cute?
Girl 1: No, he was like 45 and pretty ugly.
Girl 2: So what did you do?
Girl 1: I told him I am a lesbian and that I'm getting married soon.

Campus 0011

Guy 1: You just date girls and then you get married, that's just how it works.
Guy 2: Unless you're gay... like my roommate
Guy 1: Yeah, unless you're- wait, your roommate is gay?
Guy 2: Well, it's just that he's really effeminate, and all his friends from back home are gay... and I think he said his parents are gay too...
Guy 1: Whoa... yeah, he's totally going to be gay.

Campus 0010

Dude, if you want somebody to kick your trash, my wife could definitely do it.

parenting 0001

A sad baby is a happy baby.

campus 0009

Well, I haven't seen her naked yet, but we've gotten pretty close.